This Shift Will Create More Love and Success in Your Life

Can we create more love and success in our lives? Absolutely. And a strange research study proves it. A man named Dr. Masuru Emoto conducted a study and found an usual path to success. He attempted to determine the effect that spoken words had on water. He chose words that communicated both love and hate, then immediately froze the water to see what effects the words would have. The results were fascinating.photo_man-stress-male-face copy

Words centered around love, gratitude, happiness and appreciation formed beautiful crystals resembling intricate snowflakes. Spoken words about hate, anger and war formed images that were black and deformed. Words literally had an impact on what happened to the water. It changed its structure. This should not come as too much of a shock to us. The ancient book of Proverbs, written sometime between the 10th and 6th centuries B.C., tells us that. “life and death are in the power of the tongue.” Since research shows we are 60% water, we need to take this study seriously.

Change your words, change your life.

We are designed to be creative people. We create with our hands, our minds and with our words. Human beings have an innate ability to speak life and death over their lives and circumstances. This is one of our most powerful and overlooked abilities to bring about positive change. (more…)

How to Double Your Success in Everything


How would you like to double the quality of what you write? Or double the depth of your personal relationships? How about doubling your overall success? You can double the success of anything you want by using this technique proven by neuroscience. It’s called Positive Intention.

I am all about getting a higher return on anything I can in life. My time, my investments, my kids activities, or my experiences. Why do something with half the results? The sad fact is many people choose to live this way. They don’t take the time to optimize. If they did, their results would outperform the best Wall Street stocks. photo_success_redrocks copy

If you are a network marketer, a business person, an athlete, a speaker, a mom who is CEO of the house, or most anybody who is trying to improve, embrace this technique with everything you have because it will change your life. `

 It’s called “Mind’s Eye Rehearsal,” which is about using your mind to capitalize on the strengths of past events in your life. The idea is that if you have really excelled at something in the past, you can repeat it again in the future with similar or better results. The best thing is that what I’m about to tell you is backed by tons of research so you be assured of its value. It’s also one of the greatest ways to strengthen the neural pathways in your brain, making it easier to repeat the behavior next time.

There are two reasons for this according to Caroline Webb in her book, How to Have a Good Day.

  1. Our brains activate in a similar way when we’re visualizing something as when we are living it for real. Researchers have found the overlap to be between 60 percent and 90 percent.
  2. The more you rehearse a certain behavior, the stronger the neural pathway becomes in our brain. That’s why practice makes perfect. It’s behaviourally driven.

Why? Because neurons in your brain make connections with one another. They communicate through something called synapses. As you grow and learn new things those connection begin to change. The more you make the same connection, the easier it is to reactivate that behavior or skill. This is one of the reasons our brains continue to change throughout our lives because of something called neuroplasticity. I’ve written more about it here, “How Positivity Rewires Your Brain.

Practicing Mind’s Eye Rehearsal


Why This Is the Best Thing for Your Health

How you wake up in the morning sets the stage for the rest of your day. If you can’t get into a rhythm out of the gate, you will struggle to feel right and be focused. This 1 simple practice will help you change everything physically and mentally.

Many of my leadership clients are shocked when I tell them about the power of drinking a minimum of 16 oz of water as soon as they wake up in the morning. There are serious health and physiological benefits linked by science to this practice. Here’s why it’s a must and the reasons your body will flourish if you do. photo_water_sea-man-person-holiday copy

This is part of my Start Well/End Well Series.

You may have heard that the Japanese are known for living longer than most any people group in the world. One of the reasons they attribute to their longevity is drinking two full glasses of water when they wake up. These 7 reasons explain why they are so committed to drinking water and why you should be too.


How You Can Be Great at Anything

What would you do if you knew you couldn’t fail? Think about this: if you could be great at almost anything, what would it be? A sport? A skill? Leadership? Teaching? The guitar? So often people believe you have to be born with some genius level skill and that’s how you become great. But that is false.

What if I told you there was science proving that if you follow some important steps, you could actually be great at almost anything? Well, it’s true. So start dreaming. By the end of this post, you’ll know exactly how to do it. photo_soccer-men-grass-sport copy

I’ll never forget the time I read a book by Malcolm Gladwell called, Outliers. It was the first time for me to hear of the 10,000 hour rule. Basically the rule is this: Gladwell states research based on many genius level performers, Mozart, The Beatles, Bill Gates, and other famous people who all became experts in their fields. How did they become great? They put in over 10,000 hours into their craft – 2.74 hours a day for 10 years. He called it, “the magic number of expertise.” This reseach wasn’t actually his. It was developed by a man named Anders Ericcson who has just released a new book called, Peak – Secrets from the new science of expertise. I highly recommend this book.

Why is it important to understand the truth behind this rule? Because you can be great at almost anything if you apply what’s below. “Consistently and overwhelmingly, the evidence showed that experts are always made, not born. These conclusions are based on rigorous research that looked at exceptional performance using scientific methods that are verifiable and reproducible.” Or, perhaps you have a child who is particularly talented at music or sports and you want to help them become the best they can be. Here is the truth about how to reach those goals and become great:

The Myth of the 10,000 Rule

Gladwell wasn’t quite accurate. There’s no magic to 10,000 hours. Let me explain. If you text on your smartphone for 10,000 hours, it doesn’t mean you will become a great author. If you swing a baseball bat 10,000 times, it doesn’t mean you will make it to the major leagues. True, you will improve. But you need something else to be great. Here’s are 3 things that will help almost anyone be great at something: (more…)

Harness the Power of the Underdog

3 Ways you can implement the power of success

We don’t speak of the underdog too often. We speak about the powerful, the influential, the idea-makers, game-changers – the world class leaders. That is, unless the underdog becomes famous, then we talk about how amazing they are because they’re not underdogs anymore.

If you are an underdog, you should be grateful. If you feel like your vision, your idea, or your call are in obscurity and that no one is listening – I have good news for you. You could be in one of the best places in life. You are a secret weapon. Why? Because you will do things differently than everyone else. You will work harder. You will do what others will not. And, with persistence and hard work, you will eventually emerge from the crowd, your vision will become reality, and you will live your passion. photo_2giant-33507_1280

I love underdogs. That’s why I’ve spent much of my life helping widows and orphans. It’s the ‘weak things of the world that confound the wise.’ And I also love researching why certain people find ways to achieve extraordinary results.

“When you are an underdog, you are forced to try things you would have otherwise never attempted.” – Gladwell

People who come from the shadows into the limelight of all apply certain principles responsible for their success – and you can too. Take Howard Shultz for an example, now a billionaire. He grew up in the projects in Brooklyn before he founded Starbucks. Or, J.K. Rowling, a single mother in England who was living in abject poverty and was laughed at by publishers for her crazy book, Harry Potter. Or a little soccer team most people had never even heard of until this year that most people can’t even pronounce called Leicester City.


Lacking Purpose and Motivation? You Don’t Know Your Values.

Values. After 20 years of executive coaching and being the CEO of a multi-million dollar non-profit, I am convinced of this truth: Most people struggle to achieve their life’s purpose – and lack motivation to do so – because they do not live their values. In fact most people don’t even know their values. This happened to me and it led to a severe case of burnout.

If I asked you to name the 5 most important values that direct every decision you make, could you do it? In other words – could you tell me, without hesitation, why you do what you do? If you can’t, you are not alone. photo_catholic_church_oldman copy

Whether you know it or not, you are directing your life by a specific set of values. But they may not be the values you want. Why? Because most of us adopt the values of our parents and the dominant values of our society. The values you internalized as a child remain with you through adulthood, according to Jim Taylor, PhD in this Psychology Today article.

This is true because many of our values were shaped before the age of 5. As a 5 year old child, you are incredibly vulnerable. You are learning about the world and you are receiving information about right and wrong, fear and safety, and a host of other important issues about life. You can’t even filter this information. What you see and experience shapes your values Those who grow up in abusive homes adopt different values than those raised in a more stable environment.

How about society? What do they teach us to value? Turn on the TV or open your internet browser. Sex, money, fame and body image. Those pursuits don’t seem to get people very far down the road towards their life’s purpose and what’s really important.

What about the values of our children and this generation? A recent research study reveals that one of their key values is materialism and money, but they are not very motivated to work for it. So, give me the money while I sit on my butt. You can read about it here. I’m not a child psychologist, but I don’t think that’s going to work. Could this be one of the reasons so many millennials are moving back in with their parents according to this Wall Street Journal article?

Before you tell your life what truths and values you have decided to live up to, let your life tell you what truths you embody, what values you represent. — Parker Palmer

My son has recently been struggling with his purpose in life. He has spent a lot of time in his life focused around a certain sports activity – and he has been incredibly successful. He’s loved it and it has brought him a lot of joy. But lately, he has found himself losing his vision and passion for it. (more…)

How To Make Everyone and Everything Better

We all have the same hours in each day. The question is, “What do we do with those hours?” Research has discovered that the most successful people in life do things differently with their time. Now, what I mean by ‘successful’ isn’t limited to how much money you make or the position you have. You can have success in many different areas besides work: parenting, friendship, spirituality, caring for others, being a loving spouse – and other like-minded things. How can we focus our lives so that everyone and everything around is becoming better?

What’s interesting is that successful people spend their time in different ways the most people. They are always challenging themselves and growing. They take life more seriously than most people and they end up getting better results. photo_love_ copy

Most of us are people of habit. We get up, do the same things, go to work, talk to the same people, and keep the same routines. Rarely do things change. Of course, we shake it up every now and then with some kind of trip or vacation, but other than that, not much changes. This is called, “The cult of average,” and many believe this is true for 95% of people. These kinds of people live in stagnation or what Robert Quinn calls, the process of slow death. “If we are not learning, we are dying and when our comfort zone solidifies into habits, we get trapped in slow death, which eventually turns into negative emotions such as depression.” That is what average will do to people.

What do you do with your time? Statistics show that countless hours are wasted by people each day playing video games. According to the Wall Street Journal, millennials can rack up to a staggering 18 hours a day on the internet, video games, and social media. What’s happening to people who spend that much time online? Take another example of how much time people spend watching TV every day. For many Americans, it’s between 4 and 9 hours a day. Are we going to spend the best hours of our lives stuck to a smart phone or a television?! This is what the cult of average looks like.photo_TV_viewing2

Most people think, perform, and live at average levels. But who wants to be average?! I want to be the best I can in the areas that matter most to me. As a husband and father, as a friend, in the areas of my health, my writing and in what I’ve chosen to do for a living – which is training leaders and helping to improve the lives of others.

Only 5% of the population are living their lives with excellence. They are getting results the vast majority of the population will never get. They are spending their times on the things that matter (1) Themselves (2) Their loved ones (3) Their craft, job, or business. (more…)

You Are Ruining Your Life If You Ignore This

We’ve all heard the line, ‘Ignorance is Bliss,’ but that’s an absolute lie. Allowing ignorance in your life is destroying your energy, your potential and your dreams. You are ruining your life by your ignorance.

What am I talking about? The negative flow of thoughts, people and events that bombard you almost every moment of your life – have tremendous power. Dr. Caroline Leaf says that 75% to 95% of the illnesses that plague us today are a direct result of our thought life. We all need to pay attention to more research and what it shows is that ‘fear alone, triggers more than 1,400 known physical and chemical responses and activates more than 30 different hormones as stated in the book,’ ENERGIZE, by Gina Oldenburgphoto_sad_girl_rain2

“As a single footstep will not make a path on the earth, so a single thought will not make a pathway in the mind. To make a deep physical path, we walk again and again. To make a deep mental path, we must think over and over the kind of thoughts we wish to dominate our lives.”

Henry David Thoreau

Where did we get the idea that information and events we allow into our lives don’t matter? Why do we stand by and watch as we are flooded with the poisons of bad news, negativity and toxic relationships? These things have a PROFOUND effect on how we think and feel. There is no escaping, Listen to me, if you are not vigilant about what you allow into your life you will become the next victim in line who will never accomplish your potential because you stood there and did nothing.

Here’s some research you need to understand – our thoughts spark emotion-driven action. There is no way around it. Once you begin a thought, it triggers a vast array of signals and chemicals in your brain that literally control almost every aspect of how you feel and how you create the next thought. (more…)

This 1 Simple Shift Will Begin to Help Your Dreams Become Reality

I want to show you 1 incredibly effective change to make in your life so that you can begin to see your dreams come true – and it’s scientifically proven to work. You can create the kinds of changes in your life you long for, but two things have to happen for you to be successful: (1) knowing what to do and (2) doing it consistently over time.

Have you ever wondered why successful people seem to have win after win after win? What are they doing that the rest of the population isn’t? What’s the secret sauce? Well, it’s not something you can buy in a jar, but if you put into practice what I’m about to tell you, it will help you start succeeding on a regular basis. 

“Success is a function of persistence and doggedness and the willingness to work hard for 22 minutes to make sense of something that most people would give up on after 30 seconds.” ~ Malcolm Gladwell

This one change in your life is so simple but 90% of people won’t do it. Why? The same reason they don’t put other proven tools to use. We read books but don’t implement the concepts. We know exercising everyday is incredible for our health but most won’t make the effort. We buy into the lies the tell us that if we are really going to change and have the kind of life we want, we will have to win the lottery, walk into work and suddenly receive a massive raise or wake up one day and have the next huge idea that will make us millions. But life just doesn’t work that way.  The most successful people in the world do simple things every single day that bring them incredible results. And you can to.


It’s Almost Impossible to Change Without Knowing This

One of the most difficult things for me to do is change my behavior. As a leadership coach, I’ve found this to be a common theme for most people – it can seem impossible to change what we’ve always done. Is there a way to get rid of bad habits we’ve acquired over the years and replace them with the kind of habits we really want in life that help us become the people we want to be?

There is. You just have to discover the trick.

A Duke University researcher found that more than 40% of our actions aren’t actual decisions – they’re habits. Things we are hardly aware of and have little control over, they are on autopilot. This is research from a fascinating book I’m reading, The Power of Habit: Why we do what we do in life and business. What would our lives look like if we could reclaim a good portion of that 40% we are unaware of, and channel it into habits we want that bring us closer to the things we really care about?

Here’s what you need to know – (1) You may not remember the experience that formed the habit or habits, but once it is solidified in your brain, they influence how we act without even realizing it. This is why people can’t stop smoking, drinking or binge eating – whatever the behavior may be – they feel powerless to change.

(2) Understand the “habit loop” – cue, routine, reward. Chances are that every single one of us own products that used the science behind the habit loop to trick us into buying them. We have a closet full of them. A great example is toothpaste. The minty, tingly taste in our mouth makes us believe our teeth are crystal clean, but that taste has nothing to do with it. Toothpaste could be odorless and tasteless and work just as well. So why is it there? Because we need the ‘reward’ of feeling like our teeth are clean, that creates a craving, and that creates a habit which keeps you buying the product. Photo_habit_loop

(3) Learn the right human psychology. Claude Hopkins made millions of dollars on the toothpaste Pepsodent. Not because it tasted great, but because he understood how human beings work and followed the habit loop. He said this was based on two simple rules: First, find a simple and obvious cue and second, clearly define the rewards. He created ads that talked about the tooth film on our teeth when you rub your tongue against them. He said that is what makes your teeth off-color and invites decay (these ‘cues’ weren’t even really true, but that didn’t matter). Want pretty, clean teeth? Brush with Pepsodent (routine) and the film will be gone when you run your tongue back across your teeth. This will be evident by the minty taste (reward). When that habit loop was set, it was all over except the counting of hundred dollar bills. Before Pepsodent appeared, only 7% of Americans had a tube of toothpaste. A decade later the number jumped to 65%.

(4) Identify the cues and rewards and you can change the routine. A girl who was a chronic nail biter was sent to therapy to identify the cue. She would feel tension in her fingers, then rub her fingers along her nails looking for a hang nail (cue). She always found one and would then proceed to chomp all of her fingers (routine) until she felt a sense of completeness with smooth nails (reward). To change her habit, the therapist had her carry an index card to check every time she felt the cue – tension. When she recognized it and felt the tension she was taught a ‘competing response’ – to put her hands in her pockets or under her legs. Then she was to search for something to provide a quick physical stimulation such as rubbing her arm or hitting her knuckles on a desk. The cues and rewards stayed the same but the routine changed. A week later, she had only bitten her nails 3x. She rewarded herself with a manicure. 30 days later the nail-biting habit was completely gone.

(5) Use this new found knowledge and the habit loop to create new routines to help you create a better you. For example, I’m using it to create better exercise patterns in my life. My default cue is to get bored. I go to my phone to scroll (routines) and that gives me a reward (a brief break from the monotony). Now when I get bored (cue) I immediately exercise by taking a walk or doing pushups and situps (routine) and I’ve increased my (reward) because I get the break but also a shot of dopamine which makes me feel better. I’ve created a much better habit.

I’m also utilizing the same habit loop to create other ‘better’ habits in my life. How I start my day, keeping my vision and strategic goals in front of me on a regular basis, and how I motivate myself.

Use this skill to create a new you – a better version of yourself. By being more aware of what you are doing and what habits you possess, you can begin to take more control of your life and strategically place the habits you want in your life that strengthen who you want to be.

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